You've Got Mail (PG, 1998)

common sense media says

Predictable-but-sweet romantic comedy.


parents & educators say

What parents need to know

Parents need to know that this 1998 romantic comedy may seem old-fashioned to teen viewers, especially given the technology -- dial-up Internet access and AOL chat rooms -- at the heart of its plot. But they’ll likely find it entertaining, too, and still relatable. There’s a chain-stores-versus-independent-stores debate that may give young viewers pause (but would surely be informative). Plus, expect some discussions about infidelity and cybersex.

Positive messages: Romantic but confusing: Woman falls in love with the very man who helped destroy her family bookstore -- so perhaps the message is, love conquers all? Messages about corporate power over mom-and-pop business.
Positive role models: Kathleen is gracious and poised, and really seems to care about the people who work for her and the families that frequent her bookstore. Joe has many wonderful qualities, but he also seems cold and calculating.
Violence: Not applicable.
Sex: Some references to a man dating women way younger than him; two characters email each other and chat online and acquainted without their respective partners knowing; and there’s a passionate embrace and kiss in the end. Discussions of infidelity and cybersex.
Language: Infrequent use of “ass” and “hell.”
Consumerism: Prominent logos for Starbucks, Baby Gap, America Online (and the tell-tale sound of its dial-up service), Zabar’s, VISA, etc.
Drinking, drugs, & smoking: Social drinking, primarily wine, at events and restaurants.

More on You've Got Mail

What to talk about

Talk to your kids
  • Families can talk about the central argument of the film: Are big-box stores to blame for the decline of independent stores?

  • Is Joe’s and Kathleen’s relationship believable? Does it matter if it’s not? Do relationships that begin online face challenges that other relationships don’t? Also, talk to your children about instant messaging and other ways to communicate online.

What's the story?

What's the story?

Joe Fox (Tom Hanks) is set to open a big-box bookstore on the Upper West Side, a neighborhood that’s fiercely protective of its small shops. (At least it was when the movie was filmed.) Little does he know that the woman he’s been chatting with online, unbeknownst to his frantic, editor girlfriend (Parker Posey), is Kathleen Kelly (Meg Ryan), the proprietor of a small children’s bookstore that will likely be decimated once his mega-store opens its doors. Can love trump commerce?

Is it any good?

Is it any good?
 

There’s a reason YOU'VE GOT MAIL has become a romcom classic. It is knit together like a perfectly cabled sweater, with a nary a stitch dropped. The pacing is perfect, the characters likeable, the dialogue breezy. Some observations, including one about the overly complicated choices at chain coffee stores -- Starbucks, specifically -- still hold true. (It was filmed in the 1990s.) The arguments for the ability of small, independent stores to survive against super-stores are hopeful -- but also a sad, really, given how many have foundered in real life.

Nostalgia is one of the charms of You've Got Mail, and the old-fashioned courtship at the heart of it, despite being conducted online, is the most charming of all and references romances-by-letter of times past. Hanks and Ryan have heaps of chemistry, and though the fact that they fall in love given the circumstances seems highly unlikely — the plot’s a little far-fetched, but what romcom doesn’t have an implausible one? — we buy it because, well, why not?

Movie themes & details

Movie Details
Studio: Warner Bros.
Director: Nora Ephron
Cast: Greg Kinnear, Meg Ryan, Parker Posey, Tom Hanks
Genre: Romance
Run time: 119 minutes
Theatrical release: December 18, 1998
DVD release: May 4, 1999
MPAA Rating: PG
MPAA explanation: some language

This review was written by S. Jhoanna Robledo
 
 

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What parents & educators say

13

Most useful reviews by all members

 
Way off
Since when does Goliath winning make for a good romantic comedy? I came away from this movie angry. I didn't like Tom Hanks self-absorbed character and I didn't want Meg Ryan's to fall for him.

lorif
adult
 
A Must See!
Meg and Tom are wonderful in this. No bad language and Meg is a stitch! Definantely a must see!

 
I love this movie! Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks shine together on the scree. In an age where computers and technology are very much present, this love story is one of getting to know someone through this technology in a way that you might not in real life.

shopgirl
teen, 17 years old
 
A 'watch it 100 times' kind of movie!!!
It is a romantic comedy, that the whole family will love.You can watch it over, and over again and it will be as; New, funny, and cute as it was when you first saw the opening credits!!!

perfectionist
teen, 15 years old
 
Great romantic comedy.
This movie is wonderful. Kids could watch it; but may not like it for the romantic parts.

 
Sweet.
This movie was a lovely little tale, as Tom Hanks as a brilliant (as always) leading man and Meg Ryan suprisinly good. A family or a girls-night-in movie.

masteralex
kid, 10 years old
 
2 actors in this movie's one of mom's favorite actors

Nebi2000
kid, 11 years old
 
It was very good! The only innapropriate part was cyber sex, and that's not a lot. It was great, and I really reccomend it!

12Bows
teen, 14 years old
 
Might be a little boring for small children
It's a wonderful comedy/romance that shows how two adults fall in love, first by meeting in a chat-room. The only problem about this movie is that there's LOTS of money and business issues in this movie that may not be appropriate for tweens. The movie does have some bad language, but a very mild amount. So I wouldn't consider it a problem. If you love a good romance, this is the movie for you!

kpjarowberry
parent of 11 and 14 year old
 
One of my faves, but NOT for kids.
I LOVE this movie, and the on-screen chemistry between Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan never fails to please. However, if you are the type of parent who teaches your children to value the sanctity of marriage, skip this one. I would not recommend this a movie for anyone under the age of 14. While there are no nudity or "bedroom" scenes, there are, as the main review mentions, plenty of inappropriate relationships, not to mention some very strong language. While I realize that my 9 & 12 year olds are probably exposed to some of this in the real world, I believe that we, as parents, need to realize that we send a message of approval to our children when we bring media into our homes. Just because it is out there, and others may be allowing their children to watch, doesn't mean that we should lower our standards and follow suit. Home should be a haven from the "noises" of the world. There are plenty of other choices for the younger set.

muzikfreak147
teen, 18 years old
 
Possibly the greatest movie EVER
Possibly one of my favorite movies of all time. I don't see how You've Got Mail could be considered inappropriate by any stretch of the imagination. It is one of the greatest love stories I have ever seen, and I would recommend it to anyone, although I do think that anyone under about 13 would get pretty bored with it. There is a great message, and it is very touching

naner14
adult
 
Good, romantic chick flick!
There were a couple of iffy parts, but they were only dialogue. No visuals. I liked the plot, and Tom Hanks is as funny as ever. I fell in love with Meg Ryan in this movie. She was at her best. Perfect for ages 12+.

HappilyEverAfter
teen, 18 years old
 
Romantic but yes, predictable.
You've Got Mail is one of those movies that is like a soap opera because its almost too romantic but you can't stop watching it. I really liked it because it was a very touching story of a guy who really screwed up with his love life but was able to realize his pig-headedness and fix his mistakes before it was too late. It was funny to keep wondering whether Katharine would ever realize who her Internet buddy really was. You should definetly see it!!

lovemusic101
kid, 10 years old
 
no strong language i love it
i love it language-one s--t ass hell consumerism-starbucks aol and apple

Tsion
parent of 15 year old
 
A Witty and Light-Hearted Family Comedy!
YOU'VE GOT MAIL is from the same creators, actors, and director as SLEEPLESS IN SEATTLE. The differences being: in this one there's internet instead of a call-in-radio show, Hanks's son is replaced by Hanks's dog, and the characters meet before the very end. Saying that, it succeeds everywhere that SLEEPLESS did. It is just as fun, just as intelligent, just as romantic, and just as family-friendly. Two women briefly mention "cybersex" (not graphic at all). Passing reference is made to Hanks's stepmom "running off with the nanny" (both are women). Language consists of a few "a*s"s, one "hell", and one "b**ch". There is no violence or drugs. Great family comedy. Anyone who can watch SLEEPLESS can watch this.

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