American Ninja (R, 1985)

Mysterious drifter Joe (Michael Dudikoff) has joined up with Uncle Sam overseas, where his taciturn attitude and unique fighting skills make him an anomaly around the good ol' boys. He soon enough finds time to fall for the colonel's daughter while tipping off a sinister weapons-selling scam -- orchestrated by the army's big wigs and enforced by an unlimited supply of ninjas. But with a little help from his newfound friends, Joe is able to vanquish hundreds of would-be assassins and restore his country's good name--with the girl and all.

Technically, AMERICAN NINJA would be considered an action/adventure flick, heavy on the drama with a dash of romance thrown in for good measure. But the movie plays more like a comedy with its overabundance of senseless violence that swiftly goes from funny to hysterical with each new kick, thrust, and explosion. Add in a few noticeably un-Oscar worthy acting performances, some great stereotyping of cultures and characters, and good ol' fashioned American patriotism and you have a cutting edge martial arts cinema experience -- 20 years ago.

Aside from its 1985-esque stunts, cheesy scoring and odd slow-motion effects, NINJA has more plot than most of the movie's four other progenies. And when NINJA takes a break from all the Ninjitsu tossing violence, it actually touches on a few decent philosophical points. There are one-liners about controlling energy, freeing the mind of thought and enhancing the physical (and otherwise) senses, which of course is the essence of the martial arts depicted. But before the intellectual stimulation becomes too overbearing, lo and behold there's another body to bludgeon and cheap thrills to take its place. Bottom line: There is no reason for your kids to watch this.