It's all about hanging with friends -- online.

It’s 8:30 on a school night – do you know where your child is? Sure, he’s at his computer, but if he’s like most kids, he’s on a social networking site. But do you know what he’s doing? It’s a whole other world and we’ll help you understand (instead of worry) where your kids are hanging out.

Social networks are places where kids can hang out together online. They range from Club Penguin and Webkinz (for young kids) to MySpace and Facebook.  The sites work pretty simply: kids who sign up get a profile to post pictures of themselves, artwork, links to songs, write about what they enjoy, and connect with friends. They’ve become extensions of kids’ social lives and wonderful places for self-expression. Social networks are major communication hubs providing ways for kids to use instant messaging, “friend” one another, and write on walls to share public and private thoughts and comments.  Social networks also have games, quizzes, and applications that allow you to hug someone or drink a beer with friends.

Why they matter

Parent tips for young kids

• Stick with age-appropriate sites. For kids 5-8, there are sites with strong safety features that help kids play without risking inappropriate content or contact.

Parent tips for middle school kids

• Facebook and MySpace won't let kids have sites if they are under 13. That said, kids simply lie. Check your browser histories. If you see either site, then assume your kids have an account.
• Tell your kids to think before they post. Remind them that everything can be seen by a vast, invisible audience (otherwise known as friends of friends of friends). Each family is different, but for middle school kids at first it's a good idea for parents to have access to their kids' pages to be sure that what they're posting is appropriate. Parents can help keep them from doing something they will regret later.
  
• Make sure they set their privacy settings. They aren’t foolproof, but they’re important. Show them where the privacy settings are.
• Set some rules for what is and isn’t appropriate for your kids to communicate, play, and post online. Posts with drug taking, drinking, sexual posing or activity will come back to haunt them.
• Kindness counts. Lots of sites have anonymous applications like "bathroom wall" or "honesty boxes" that allow users to tell their friends what they think of them. Rule of thumb: If your child wouldn't say it to someone's face, they shouldn't post it. 
• Go online. Get an account for yourself.  See what kids can and can't do.

Parent tips for high school kids

• Talk about the nature of their digital world. Remind them that anyone can see what’s on their pages—even if they think no one will. Potential employers and college admissions people can easily surface these sites. Ask your teens to think about who might see their pages and how they might interpret the posts or photos.
• Let them know that anything they create or communicate can be cut, altered, pasted, and sent around. Once they put something on their pages, it’s out of their control and can be taken out of context and used to hurt your teen or someone else.  This includes talk and photos of sex, drugs, and alcohol. Tell them that online stuff can last forever. If they wouldn't put something on the hallway in school, they shouldn’t post it on their pages.
• Remind them of the golden rule. If they wouldn’t want someone saying it them, they shouldn’t say it to anyone else.
• If they meet someone, it better be in a public place, preferably with a friend. We would all like to think that kids wouldn’t meet strangers – but sometimes they do. Stress to your kids this is not a safe or smart idea.
• Watch the clock.Social network sites can be real time sucks. Hours and hours can go by -- which isn't great for homework.

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