The downfall of cartoons.
Ugh, Caillou. The name alone is impossible to pronounce without at least a small hint of annoyance. Because the only way you would even know how to pronounce it in the first place, is if you watch the show. After all the horrible theme song at the beginning says his name a million times. It's pronounced Kai you, and supposedly it's French, but every character is speaking English with no accent. It takes place in Canada, which I don't think is ever mentioned or even hinted at, but it doesn't say it takes place in America either, and I've read in many places it's meant to be Canada, so I'll accept that. Sure, in some parts of Canada French is spoken, but again, none of the characters speak French or have an accent, so this clearly isn't Quebec. Did they just like the name, perhaps because they're pretentious? But his name is not the weirdest part about this kid. You might think it's his bald head. That's the first thing you noticed, right? Sure, in just about every picture on this sight he's wearing a hat or a helmet, but in the show, that bald head is rarely left uncovered. They want you to see it. They want you to be haunted by it. To question what on Earth the logic behind it is. Are his parents skinheads? No. They both have hair, and so does their daughter. Does Caillou have cancer? No. You never see him go to the hospital, and he seems perfectly healthy, if not a wimp most of the time. So why is he bald? Supposedly it's so kids could relate to him regardless of their race or hair color. That's why he's blindingly white and has a white family, right? Just give him black hair, anyone regardless of race can have black hair, it's pretty much the default hair color of humanity. But that's not the weirdest part of him either. Oh no. The weirdest part of him, by far, is his strange mood swings. I'm no psychiatrist, so I don't know if he has bipolar disorder, or some sort of multiple personality disorder (I don't even know the technical term for this) But most of the time he's perfectly well-behaved. He's nice, he's happy, he enjoys spending time with his family and friends, and believe me, it will make you want to vomit. This kid is sickeningly sweet. Most of the time. But sometimes, he gets nasty. There's a few episodes where he won't get what he wants, and instead of dealing with it somehow, perhaps teaching kids problem solving or negotiation skills, or how to preoccupy themselves when there's just no avoiding a bad situation, and power through it, what he'll do is throw himself on the floor and kick and scream and wail and cry. "Mommy I don't want to play with Rosie! She's annoying!" Rosie is his sister, by the way. "Daddy, I want to go to the circus today, not tomorrow!" "Mommy, Andre broke my chair!" That last example is particularly annoying when you remember a few episodes ago he accidentally broke one of his friends' toys, and was sad when they were angry at him temporarily. Now he's yelling at this other kid for doing the exact same thing. The smallest inconvenience will set him off, often with no warning, no build-up, just an immediate shift from way too happy to inconsolable and angry. This is by far the strangest thing about this strange little boy. Not his name, not his bald head, but his obvious mental instability. I know little kids can throw tantrums out of nowhere, and sometimes it can seem like a very insignificant catalyst, but while it usually can take hours for them to get over it, he goes right back to being happy just as quickly as he turned angry. Watch Caillou Joins the Circus to see what I mean, that's the most infamous episode of this series. I've ranted at length about this show and i'm still not done, because i still have to talk about his parents. They are way too patient with this nutty little brat. While Caillou's mood changes extremely quickly, I don't think I've ever seen these two show any emotion besides a vaguely bored happiness. Caillou is breaking his toys because he thought the circus was today? I'll just go downstairs and make toast shaped like circus animals (Which is not as easy as it sounds, go into your kitchen and make some toast, then try to cut it with a knife into the shape of an elephant, you'll probably end up with just a mess to clean up.) Caillou is locking his sister out of his room and making her cry? I'll just sit here and do my unspecified "job" filling out paperwork and ignore the whole thing. Caillou is crying because he can't ice skate very well? I'll just continue gliding around on the ice like a fairy princess and encourage him to try again, so he can humiliate himself for the audience's amusement. Yes, you'll find the only times you enjoy this show are when he's making a fool of himself and throwing a fit. The rest of the time you'll just be bored with this kid's vapid happiness. Remember when cartoons used to be good? What great cartoons did you grow up with? Nowadays western cartoons are garbage and I pretty much only watch anime, but back in the day we had good shows like Ren and Stimpy, Hey Arnold, Invader Zim, Billy and Mandy, even the timeless classics like Tom and Jerry and Bugs Bunny. And this is what kids today is watching? It's no wonder anime is so popular, like me they've noticed the downfall of western animation. And this show is not even relatively new. It actually came out around the same time as those shows I grew up with. But unlike those shows that are no longer on TV, just on the internet, they still air this show. It's still around. It refuses to just go away. Kids reading this, if you've made it this far, and you want a great show with a bald protagonist, go watch One Punch Man.