He's Just Not That Into You (PG-13, 2009)

common sense media says

Appealing but unsurprising romcom dispenses familiar wisdom.


parents & educators say
  • 30% say sexual content is an issue

What parents need to know

Parents need to know that this romantic comedy, while often charming, reinforces the idea that being in a relationship is the surest way to be happy. Both male and female characters conform to fairly standard romcom "types," and while the movie attempts to shed fresh light on the ups and downs of dating, it all boils down to how men and women long for someone to love. Expect some mild nudity (nothing sensitive shown), swearing, and social drinking. The question of whether or not one character is smoking in secret plays a significant role in the movie. One storyline deals with infidelity, and there are a few heated exchanges between couples.

Positive messages: Ultimately the movie reinforces the idea that being in a relationship is the key to happiness -- an iffy message at best. Many different types of relationships are portrayed, with different levels of happiness.
Positive role models: Both male and female characters are somewhat stereotypical -- many of
the men are portrayed as especially callow -- and both genders are
shown having problems reading the other's signals and sending mixed
messages. One male character is brutally honest in evaluating a woman's
love life, but she ultimately appreciates and learns from his candor. Some characters seem to believe that getting married and/or being in a relationship is the only way to be happy. One character has an affair.
Violence: Couples yell in a few scenes; in a fit of rage, a woman throws a mirror on the floor and breaks it.
Sex: Couples kiss, make out, and discuss sex. A woman disrobes off-camera and jumps into the water to skinny dip after she propositions a married man, though viewers don't actually see any sensitive body parts. A couple kisses and fondles each other in an office; later, a woman straddles a man in the same office and they presumably make love (but it's not shown).
Language: Language includes several "s--t"s, a couple of uses of "f--k," "suck," "ass," "bullsh--t," "a--holes," "boobs," "dick," and "oh my God."
Consumerism: Brands/logos for cigarettes (American Spirit is particularly prominent), beer, and a few other products (Crest WhiteStrips) are shown. The movie is based on a popular self-help book by the same name.
Drinking, drugs, & smoking: One character lies about smoking in secret; some casual/social drinking and smoking at parties, restaurants, and bars.

More on He's Just Not That Into You

What to talk about

Talk to your kids
  • Families can talk about how the film portrays dating and romance. Ask your teens if this is what they think adult relationships are really like.
  • Do the characters in the movie seem realistic, or are they exaggerated "types"? Are men really that unable to communicate? Are they really that insensitive? And is it really true that women can't -- or won't -- read their signs?
  • Do you think the women in the movie are more or less stereotyped than the men? Is that typical in Hollywood romantic comedies?
  • What do you think of the role that cigarettes and smoking play in the film? What's the impact of seeing smoking in movies?

What's the story?

What's the story?
Inspired by the best-selling self-help book from Sex and the City writers Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo, HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU follows the romantic ups and downs of several interconnected Baltimore characters. Taking center stage is loveable "girl next door" Gigi (Ginnifer Goodwin), who just wants to find the man of her dreams. But, sadly, she can't read guys' signals. After a ho-hum date with Conor (Kevin Connolly), it takes Conor's buddy, Alex (Justin Long), to set her straight, delivering the film's titular message: If a guy wants to spend time with you, he'll "make it happen." Otherwise, forget it. Meanwhile, Conor's in love with singer/yoga instructor Anna (Scarlett Johansson), who's hooked on Ben (Bradley Cooper), who happens to be married to Gigi's colleague, the high-strung Janine (Jennifer Connelly). Their office friend, Beth (Jennifer Aniston), is having relationship issues, too; her longtime boyfriend, Neil (Ben Affleck), loves her to pieces but just won't marry her. Rounding out the ensemble is Anna's pal, Mary (Drew Barrymore), who spends more time with her gay co-workers than with dates and who's befuddled by "advances" in technology -- texting, MySpace, email, voicemail -- that allow everyone to be in touch but seem to hinder actual connections.

Is it any good?

Is it any good?
 

For a romantic comedy filled with predictable characters, HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU is surprisingly entertaining. The A-list ensemble definitely has something to do with that; they work well together to tell a story that, frankly, could have wound up a huge clichéd mess. Instead, it's pleasant and occasionally even perceptive. Goodwin, who has the heftiest part by a small margin, anchors the movie with a performance that's likable and empathetic. Her male counterpart, Long, is surprisingly affecting, too. He could easily have become a one-dimensional stereotype as the scold explaining how a woman should be able to tell if a man's not interested. And, as the wronged wife, Connelly adds some much-needed gravitas.

But for all that, the movie isn't particularly memorable. The book that inspired it has been out for a while (frankly, it was overexposed), and the "revelations" here hardly feel like epiphanies. The structure doesn't help; artificially divided into vignettes that ostensibly each explain a nugget of wisdom, the film lacks momentum. And with so many competing storylines, it also feels a bit crowded. Doing away with one thread -- or trimming a few -- would have allowed the others room to breathe and given the audience more opportunity to actually get to know some of its characters. As it stands, it feels a lot like speed dating, and audiences don't end up with Prince Charming in the end.

Movie themes & details

Movie Details
Studio: New Line
Director: Ken Kwapis
Cast: Drew Barrymore, Jennifer Aniston, Scarlett Johansson
Genre: Comedy
Run time: 127 minutes
Theatrical release: February 6, 2009
DVD release: June 2, 2009
MPAA Rating: PG-13
MPAA explanation: sexual content and brief strong language
Watch our review

This review was written by S. Jhoanna Robledo
 
 

Review It

 

Review He's Just Not That Into You





Hang on! You need to be a member to post your review.
A safe community is important to us. Please observe our guidelines.
 

What parents & educators say

12
Based on 10 parent & educator reviews:
  • 30% say sexual content is an issue

Most useful reviews by all members

grantmywish3
teen, 14 years old
 
mostly about sex. but i lovvee it!

tweeni
teen, 15 years old
 
a good romcance comedy for teens
i really liked this movie! i thought that some of the sexual behavior wasn't appropriate for younger kids, but there aren't many scenes when anything revealing is shown. its a really good romance comedy, and is based on the relationships of men and women in their twenties. girls are worried and wonder why the guys won't call them back, and fret over it which is funny to watch. however, the rolemodels aren't necessarily good. i would say anyone twelve and up could see it; its funny and the romance isn't explicit. all in all, a good movie!

anyaya
teen, 15 years old
 
Saw it 3 times and loved it but my mom didnt
Its a hella good movie!!! I saw it 3 times n luv it. Saw it with 2 friends n my mom. me n my friends, all 12, rly liked it but my mom didnt. she said the relationships were "un-appealing and that it had a negative view on marridge but i really liked it! It did have alot of sex scenes though. And had us closing the door alot so no parents would walk in

pinkpiggy
parent of 4 and 8 year old
 
a no go 2 c
younge kids don't need to be thinking of relationships in those way. there is enough problems with preteens and jr.high students dateing with these messages in mind.

dwiggit101
teen, 16 years old
 
Great romcom! :0
This was a very good movie. I like how every character knew each other in one way or another and that the story was intertwined. Some language. Sex is talked about a lot. All in all, I think this is a good movie!

 
NOT! DONT WASTE YOUR TIME
this was a very confusing movie. all the characters and really there wasnt much of a plot. i hated how everyone talked about sex as if it was something you have to have to be in a serious relationship. they said lines like "she's not having sex with me, i dont know what it means, i think i should break up with him". there was a few good role models, and a few bad. there was a lot of counterism ex. american spirit, crest whitestrips, kroger, ect. they used VERY BAD LANGUAGE! this should not be seen! f--k, s--t, bi--h, a-shole, bulls--t

mango.grl
teen, 16 years old
 
Really awesome movie :)
This movie is one of the best I've seen in awhile. It has some mature content though, and it probably should be viewed by age 13+, maybe 12 depending on the child. It's a funny romantic comedy/chick flick. It's a fun movie to pop some popcorn and watch with the girls. The story is pretty cool too, that all of them relate to eachother. It doesn't exactly send an amazing message, but it's a funny movie.

silly_samsters
teen, 17 years old
 
Good COMEDY
I loved this movie a lot. I do however wish that they didnt have to put so much bad language into it. This movie is really funny about why some guys dont call you back after the first date. Good Movie Very Interesting.

m1
teen, 16 years old
 
Very Funny, Sometimes Serious, Great Cast
This movie was funny and entertaining. The cast was brilliant, especially the performances by Jennifer Connelly, Ginnifer Goodwin, and Drew Barrymore. There are a couple of kisses, some scenes of drinking, and some relationship themes involving divorce and cheating. Not a good message, but not a destructive one, either.

drama_1414
teen, 18 years old
 
I laughed and thought it was a great movie
Saw this movie with my 6 friends at my birthday and thought it was great.Though gigi could get on your nerves very easily. It made you laugh out loud alot :)

movie_lover11
teen, 16 years old
 
i think its for its for teens really but it a alright movie
i thought it was fine but it talked much bout sexual things there some drinking but nothing where peple get drunk i think it would be okay for 13 year olds

 

misscompetitive
teen, 16 years old
 
This movie is good. there is brief language, mention of smoking multiple times, and some sexual content. if i were rating it i would deffinatly rate it pg13. its more of a movie for girls between the ages of 13 and 14 my brother hated it. and i bet most guys would. i loved it though i think you should deffinatly see it.

SomebodysMe
teen, 17 years old
 
Don't waste your time
While watching this movie, we threatened to turn it off numerous times. It is one of those shows is very confusing, and only gets better in the last 20 minutes. There are some extreme fast-forwarding moments, and strong language. Don't waste 2 hours of your good time watching it!

AudyandSuejy
teen, 16 years old
 
Mature, take a twelve year old with parent
We thought it was good movie. It had a lot of making out but it wasnt too inapropriate. We thought it was touching but not a good family film. GREAT for laugh!:D

BugGirl
kid, 13 years old
 
TORTURE!
OH my gosh! It was the worst movie I've ever seen in my life! I actually fell asleep I got so bored. I finally woke up when the credits appeared. (most interesting part in the movie) Who needs to worry about that kind of love? I suggest you do something better with your time. :P

mason123456
teen, 14 years old
 
really good movie its funny i love it!!!

hodge3448
teen, 18 years old
 
Good Movie.
I thought it was a great movie. The role models aren't very good but otherwise, good movie.

del18
teen, 42 years old
 
14
I absolutely love this movie but there are parts that aren't very appropriate. There's a lot sexual content and a lot of bad language too. That said, it's really funny and most 14 year olds will be just fine watching it.

eastside01
teen, 17 years old
 
I hear date night for the ladies.
For a PG-13 movie the movie has some heavy sexual seens including references but the movie is a familiar romantic comedy that offers nothing new but is quite good at times.

An independent voice for families
Age-appropriate reviews
 

vote now

Will you see He's Just Not That Into You?


Already seen it? What do you think?

 

Great alternatives handpicked by our editors


About our rating system
ON: Content is appropriate for kids this age.
PAUSE: Know your child, some content may not be right for some kids
OFF: Not age appropriate for kids this age