The Kids Are All Right (R, 2010)

common sense media says

Mature, witty family dramedy explores love, parenthood.


parents & educators say
  • 91% say sexual content is an issue
  • 82% say language is an issue

What parents need to know

Parents need to know that this witty, worldly dramedy about a lesbian couple whose teenage children decide to acquaint themselves with their sperm-donor father deals frankly (and compassionately) with all of the complications that could arise in that situation -- including marital discord, infidelity, biological identity, nature vs. nurture, and letting go of a child on the brink of adulthood. Thanks to those themes and some other fairly mature content -- including partial nudity (breasts, buttocks) during sex scenes, clips from a pornographic movie, swearing, and teenage drinking and drug use -- The Kids Are All Right is best for older teenagers and adults.

Positive messages: The movie's central messages revolve around parenting, presenting it as a difficult task, but one with infinite rewards if you do your job right. It suggests that being a parent goes way beyond titles -- what is a mother? what is a father? -- and that it's who you are and how you treat your kids that makes you a good parent (or not). The film also seems to be saying that growing up requires some distancing from our parents -- a dicey transition that can bring out the worst in people, at least for a little while.
Positive role models: Nic and Jules are devoted to their children, and even though they make mistakes, take each other for granted, and are prone to bickering, they love and respect each other. Paul steps up and embraces fatherhood, despite his unusual path to that role. And although teens Laser and Joni push boundaries, they're aware that their actions have repercussions for which they should be responsible.
Violence: A teenage boy berates and belittles his friend and hits him. Men and women hurt the ones they love both with actions and with words.
Sex: A man and a woman are seen having sex; her breasts are visible, and his
behind is shown thrusting. Teens watch a pornographic movie that shows men hooking up with each other (their behinds are visible). A woman goes under the covers and performs a sex act on her female partner. A teen girl talks about older men -- and everything else -- in a sexualized manner.
Language: Many uses of words including “bitches," “ass," "s--t," "f--k," "d--k," "p---y," "oh my God" (as an exclamation), and "hell."
Consumerism: Not applicable.
Drinking, drugs, & smoking: Teens are shown drinking and crushing a pill, then snorting the resulting powdery substance. An adult appears to like drinking a bit too much, and she and her partner bicker over it.

More on The Kids Are All Right

What to talk about

Talk to your kids
  • Families can talk about the troubles that Nic and Jules face as parents and partners. What does the movie say about relationships and parenting?
  • What makes someone a good parent? How does the media typically portray parents? Do the parents in this movie seem more or less realistic to you than those in other movies/TV shows? Why?
  • How does the movie portray teen drinking and drug use? Are there consequences for the behavior? What do you think would happen in real life?

What's the story?

What's the story?
Joni (Mia Wasikowska) and her brother Laser (Josh Hutcherson) have never known their father's identity; their moms -- Nic (Annette Bening), a doctor, and Jules (Julianne Moore), a fledgling landscape artist -- used a sperm bank to get pregnant. Once Joni turns 18, Laser urges her to take advantage of her right to find out who the anonymous donor was. Nic and Jules are concerned, but they agree to meet the “bio-dad,” a free-spirited, organic-farming restaurateur named Paul (Mark Ruffalo). The introduction goes fairly smoothly, but a bumpy road lies ahead ... especially when Jules starts designing Paul’s backyard and the kids decide it’s time to get to know him better.

Is it any good?

Is it any good?
 

THE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT may be known for the fact that it's a movie about same-sex parenting. But beyond that, it's a smart, funny, and affecting look at modern-day relationships and the daily -- and, in this case, outsized -- pressures that erode their foundation. Parenting is exhausting, couplehood can be draining, and making messes is much too tempting. It’s difficult terrain no matter who's in your family.

Part of what makes the movie refreshing is that there are no villains here -- just adults and, to a lesser degree, teens trying to make sense of their complexities, desires, and confusions. In short, trying to be all right. The three leads show off their ferocious gifts with surety, and the kids -- Wasikowska, especially -- skillfully keep up. The script isn’t without its weak spots: What compels Jules to take up with Paul is a mystery, for instance (and no, his scruffy good looks alone don’t explain it). But the movie? It’s still all right. It’s more than all right.

Movie themes & details

Movie Details
Studio: Focus Features
Director: Lisa Cholodenko
Cast: Annette Bening, Julianne Moore, Mark Ruffalo
Genre: Drama
Run time: 104 minutes
Theatrical release: July 9, 2010
DVD release: November 16, 2010
MPAA Rating: R
MPAA explanation: strong sexual content, nudity, language and some teen drug and alcohol use
Watch our review

This review was written by S. Jhoanna Robledo
 
 

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What parents & educators say

16
Based on 11 parent & educator reviews:
  • 91% say sexual content is an issue
  • 82% say language is an issue
  • 55% say there's too much drinking, drugs, or smoking
  • 27% say there are positive messages

Most useful reviews by all members

 
The Kids are All Right is an honest, funny, dysfunctional, emotional, and graphically sexual portrayal of the American family. The individuals in the film were so believable and relatable. I laughed and cried my way through the whole thing. The challenges of parenting, allowing your children to grow up, love, changing friends, changing priorities, changing goals, the meaning of family, growing up, and confronting dissatisfaction within long relationships are frankly and capably represented. Well worth the watch for adults and older teens/college students. There is too much sexual content and mature subject matter in here for anyone younger.

zanderman1997
teen, 14 years old
 
just shows where are world is

Gina_
parent of 18 year old
 
disappointed... Hopes dashed for a great Lesbian indie
HATE IT!! Steryotypical america that has a Lesbian cheating with a man, she is not remourseful of her 18+ year relationship. There are several a porn like sex scene of the man and woman and joking undertones of the 18+ year relationship, no even remotely sexual tension betweent the couple. Sad to me because there were some amazing moments that brought tears to my eyes, but I was so infuriated with the complete lack of regard for the relationship and the fact that a Lesbian would NOT be excited to see some dude's junk I couldn't enjoy the movie. I had such high hopes that this would be a great "real" movie on that struggle especially that it was an indie flim, however Hollywood wins again and the movie is catered to the male idea that we all need the "man" ... very disappointed, no wonder america doesn't take a stand for Gay marriage, according to this movie it's laughable to cheat on your partner of 18+ years... shame on you

 
Excellent witty dramedy and superb performances .... loved it.
i so wanted to see this movie and i did, loved it so much. excellent movie. it is well one of the best movies this year and definitely one of the best family Drama/ comedy too. i don't like to compare but i think American beauty was seriously better than this that is a classic but this one was excellent. I absolutely loved The Kids Are All Right. Everything that belongs in a great Oscar winning movie is here. The performances from Annette Bening (Nic), Julianne Moore (Jules) and Mark Ruffalo (Paul) are fantastic. They bring great depth and humour to their roles and they make the story and the characters they are portraying to be believable and we get to care for them and also feel for them. Expect, Bening, Moore and Ruffalo to be up for acting Oscars next year as well as a Best Original Screenplay nod and I would not be surprised if this is nominated for Best Picture and even comes close to winning. The film is that good. We have a great character study, a film that resembles real life and is believable and is anchored by great performances and writing. This is certainly one of the best films of 2010 and I look forward to seeing this sweep the award season and with reason to. julianne Moore plays the character that experiences the biggest arc in the story - nurturing and self-reflective one minute, spontaneous and regretful the next. For an actress often at home in period roles that require her to express repression, this feels like her most liberating work. As Joni, Mia Wasikowska - superb in Tim Burton's redux of "Alice in Wonderland" earlier this year - has the coltish manner of a young Gwyneth Paltrow and brings lucidity to her maturing character. Growing up from his cherubic turns in "Little Manhattan" and "The Bridge to Terabithia", Josh Hutcherson appears to be graduating to troubled adolescent roles with ease. The simultaneous sympathy for all characters that Cholodenko has beautifully crafted makes the resolution of conflict so much more meaningful and the message of unconditional love all the more powerful. It's further proof that the best dramas, the ones that leave the biggest impact, paint characters in many shades of gray and not just politically speaking. an excellent movie, The Kids Are All Right is a smart, cheerful, character-driven relationship comedy. In other words. Do watch.

 
A brilliant, mature, and intelligent look at life...
I can not possibly speak more highly of The Kids Are All Right. The film will certainly garner several Oscars, and in my opinion, Best Picture. Cholodenko has truly outdone herself. An independent masterpiece.

 
Ok movie but not for kids or young teens
The movie was ok. I agree with what a previous poster Gina wrote though. I think that the story line was kind of unbelievable. It was about a lesbian couple that have been together for over 18 years and then one of them just all of a sudden starts having sex with a man. It was kinda weird but the movie was ok.

person14
teen, 16 years old
 
Supportive parents , lots of sex and funny witty dialog. For once a comedy that has a gay couple in it. well acted and very unique.

sdddtd
adult
 
Missed Opportunity
This movie missed a great opportunity to portray a really good story with a great message by adding the VERY graphic porn and VERY graphic sex scenes which did not add to the story only detracted. It could have been a great PG13 movie. Good acting, nice story. My kids see gay and lesbian couples with kids and this could have helped them understand their similar struggles and concerns. Too bad a potential good movie became a loser. Hollywood needs to learn that for the majority less is more and sex is sexier when left to our imagination.

mardoggie2013
teen, 17 years old
 
Oscar worthy, not for younger teens.
This is a wonderful comedy film, although it's for older, mature teens. Honestly, they've seen this material before, and they're at the age that they are mature enough to look beyond it and see a well done film.

dricelo
parent
 

 
Not All Right for the Kids
I'm thrilled that gay/lesbian couples are FINALLY becoming a more prominent part of film and television culture. That being said, this is not a movie for kids. I'd even go so far as to say it's not for teens, either, given the amount of explicit sexual content (gay, straight, all of the above) and pretty deep themes, such as infidelity, what constitutes a family, coming of age... substance abuse... Not a movie for family night, but definitely a winner.

masonlackey
teen, 14 years old
 
good movie
good movie

mlbrown
parent of 12 and 14 year old
 
There are better movies out there and my time is too valuable
I thought it was ok. My son hated it. He said what was the point? The tv series Parenthood is far superior at showing relationships. This could have been a better movie if the biological father had not gotten quite so involved in their lives. Must every parent totally mess up in the movies??

CBeth
parent of 10 year old
 
Disappointing, given the interesting subject matter
I honestly had higher expectations for the movie, based on reviews. But it was quite disappointing. The story was obvious, and not as compelling as it might have been. I did not see a positive vibe between the Bening and Moore characters --- nothing to do with them being lesbians, it just portrayed a marriage that I did not see as positive; also they did not seem to have a believable chemistry. I would actually say that the Bening character was not a positive role model (not that this excuses the adultery either but Moore's character was more real/sympathetic). I gave it a note for the drinking and drugs, although the message was clearly that one should not engage in irresponsible behavior around those items. Anyway, clearly an adult film, not for kids.

 
Funny, but the dark type
It was good. Bening gave a pretty good and, at times, hilarious perfomance, as did Moore. This is a movie about bringing someone into your life and how much they can change your family's life. I would see it again. Some semi-comic, clear sex scenes. Messages aren't good as adultery is depicted. Very much meant for older audiences, but I have a mature mind for a 15-year-old (as of January 2011). As stated before, it depends on the maturity level of the viewer. Worth watching overall.

gbsfan
teen, 17 years old
 
Disappointed
I thought it was disappointing. I would also say that it kind of homophobic. Way too many sex scenes. Not too violent though, which is good. My dad thought it was just OK and my friend thought it horrible.

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