Gigli (R, 2003)

Larry Gigli (Ben Affleck) is a small-time enforcer for a small-time hood named Louis. Larry's latest assignment is to kidnap a retarded young man named Brian (Justin Bartha) to help Louis and his colleagues can apply some pressure to Brian's brother. So Larry picks up Brian and brings him back to his apartment. A beautiful woman (Jennifer Lopez) who says her name is Ricki tells Larry that she has also been hired by Louis to make sure he does not mess up the job. Larry's macho ego is affronted, but he is attracted to Ricki, even after she tells him she is gay. A lot of bickering and bantering later, much of it involving mind-numbing debates over who is the boss and straight vs. gay sex, plus encounters with the mother of one and the ex-lover of the other, Larry and Ricki have to decide whether they are willing to hurt or kill Brian and that leads them to think differently about themselves and each other.

GIGLI is less a movie than a string of over-the-top audition monologues, those random set-pieces designed to show off an actor's facility with language and attitude. Those can be entertaining in their own way, but they do not have anything to do with creating a character or telling a story, just two of the many movie-making essentials that are missing. The movie has the traditional odd couple structure -- friction, the chance to prove themselves to one another, mutual epiphanies, and finally, respect and affection. But it never finds any tone or direction or believable connection between the characters.

Larry and Ricki are one-dimensional characters, their bickering has no spark, and the evolution of their relationship isn't believable because they're just attributes and attitude, with no internal consistency. Meanwhile, Christopher Walken (as a cop) and Al Pacino (as a crime boss) drop by for showy scenes that have some verve but add nothing to the plot, tone, or themes of the movie. Indeed, there really is nothing that could be called plot, tone, or theme in this movie. It's not the worst movie ever. It's not even the worst movie of the year. And it's not as bad as the Jen/Ben backlash want it to be. But it is not a good movie, and it is a terrible waste of talent.

Studio: Columbia Tristar
Director: Martin Brest
Cast: Ben Affleck, Jennifer Lopez, Justin Bartha
Genre: Action/Adventure
Run time: 124 minutes
Theatrical release: July 24, 2003
DVD release: December 8, 2003
MPAA Rating: R
MPAA explanation: sexual content, pervasive language and brief strong violence