Miss March (R, 2009)

There's a time-honored place -- especially among adolescents -- for R-rated comedies. Some, like the recent offerings of Judd Apatow and his proteges, are worth seeing more than once. MISS MARCH, which was written and directed by its stars Cregger and Moore, isn't even worth seeing a first time. From its disgusting shots of feces spreading under Eugene's hospital gown to its base, juvenile depictions of relationships, lesbianism, epileptics, and firefighters, it's just gross.

Hefner, who appears as himself in a lengthy cameo, is the most robust character in the entire raunchfest, which seems more like a lustful 13-year-old boy's daydream than a script greenlit by grown Hollywood executives. Apparently the lesson is that "there's a bunny in every woman" no matter how unlikely they are to become Playboy centerfolds. But that throwaway line is lost amid 90 minutes of crappy (literally) and misogynistic jokes. At least the bunnies come across as the salt of the earth: Playmate of the Year 2007 Sara Jean Underwood cares about puppies!