My Bloody Valentine 3-D (R, 2009)

common sense media says

Ultra-gory slasher remake isn't for kids.

parents & educators say

76% say violence is an issue
71% say sexual content is an issue

What parents need to know

Parents need to know that this ultra-gory slasher/horror remake is full of foulmouthed, unsavory characters, many of whom end up getting speared by pickaxe blades, shot, dismembered, and/or eviscerated. Human hearts are torn out and put inside chocolate boxes. There's extensive nudity in a sex scene that eventually becomes a nude chase-murder scene. Teenagers drink with abandon, police officers are unethical, husbands are unfaithful, and boyfriends are menacing. Strong language flows freely, from "damn" to "f--k" and everything in between.

Positive messages: Repeated themes of infidelity in relationships and cops behaving badly (vigilante justice or worse).

Positive role models: Nobody worth emulating here -- the characters are pretty much uniformly unsavory and unsympathetic.

Violence: Bloody dismembered bodies, characters speared with pickaxes through the skull and torso. One such impaling makes a bloody eyeball pop out of the face. Another rips off a man's jaw and throws it across the film frame. A girl's head is split in two by a shovel. Characters are shot at close range. Visuals of ripped-out human hearts, as well as the gaping chest cavities.

Sex: Characters make a "sex tape" together in a softcore scene that features both male (from the rear) and female (from about every angle there is) nudity. An extended chase scene shows the same actress fully naked. Dialogue includes references to "hand jobs," marital infidelity, and out-of-wedlock pregnancy.

Language: Frequent strong language, including numerous uses of "f--k" and "s--t," as well as "c--k," "p---y," "ass," "bitch," "damn," and "oh my God."

Consumerism: Some product names in the background of a grocery store, barely distinct.

Drinking, drugs, & smoking: Cigarette smoking, some drinking (including underaged). One character is obviously drunk. A main character takes some sort of prescription medication for mental illness.

Our ratings and reviews are informed by child development guidelines. Learn more.

What to talk about

Talk to your kids

Families can talk about the appeal of this type of horror movie. Why do audiences enjoy watching people be hideously killed? How does seeing this type of violence affect viewers?
How does this kind of horror film compare to scares in older movies of the 1950s, '40s, and '30s, when audiences got their thrills from the tamer Dracula, Wolf Man, or Black Lagoon creature?
Parents, ask your teens about their favorite horror movies or slasher villains. Why do they like them? What sets one apart from the other?

What's the story?

In a small, dreary mining town called Harmony, miner Harry Warden -- who was trapped in a Valentine's Day cave-in -- earns notoriety by pick-axing to death all the miners stuck with him (he wanted all the air for himself). Though found comatose, Harry wakes up to claim additional victims (hospital personnel and partying teens) before being shot and chased into the depths of the mine. Ten years later, on the anniversary of the slaughter, Tom Hannigan (Jensen Ackles) -- who barely escaped Harry the first time -- returns to town to take ownership of his family's mine. An old high-school love triangle rekindles between Tom, volatile young sheriff Axel (Kerr Smith), and Axel's betrayed wife (Jaime King). Coincidentally, a shambling figure in a gas mask and mining uniform recommences pick-axing townspeople and ripping out their hearts to make grotesque Valentines. Is Harry still alive -- or is it some other masked maniac?

Is it any good?

MY BLOODY VALENTINE 3-D remakes a 1981 Canadian "splatter" film of the same name -- which itself was one of many copies of the original Halloween and Friday the 13th that got cranked out when studios discovered young ticket buyers with an insatiable appetite for cheaply produced, graphically explicit gore-sex-murder flicks with a strong teenage vibe. If you were very lucky, there might be a "whodunit" aspect and OK acting to make it more than just sadistic dare-you-to-look locker-room voyeurism.

That's the case with the 2009 MBV, which not only has a climactic twist but also well-done 3-D special effects (a "flat" 2D version was also released). Some visual gimmickry -- like an eyeball popping out -- exploits the "sicko" possibilities of the effects; others are spookier and more subtle, like the slow sweep of a rifle barrel or the lighthouse-like beacon of the killer's flashlight helmet. Only in the last 15 minutes or so are so many items poked and thrown in your face that it becomes deadening overkill. It may or may not help that this shocker treats the whole plot seriously, not parodying the trashy cliches of such shockers the way the popular Scream movies do.

Movie themes & details

Movie Details

Studio: Lionsgate
Director: Patrick Lussier
Cast: Jaime King, Jensen Ackles, Kerr Smith
Genre: Horror
Run time: 101 minutes
Theatrical release: January 16, 2009
DVD release: May 19, 2009
MPAA Rating: R
MPAA explanation: graphic brutal horror violence and grisly images throughout, some strong sexuality, graphic nudity and language

Watch our review

This review was written by Charles Cassady Jr.

Review It

What parents & educators say

Based on 17 parent & educator reviews:

76% say violence is an issue
71% say sexual content is an issue
53% say language is an issue
35% say there's too much drinking, drugs, or smoking

Read the reviews

Most useful reviews by all members

Shizzuii
teen, 18 years old

I didn't like it. It was boring and didn't scare me at all. Lots of explicit violence and sexual content.

What other families should know

Movie Details

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Genre

My Bloody Valentine 3-D (R, 2009)

common sense media says

parents & educators say

What parents need to know

More on My Bloody Valentine 3-D

What to talk about

Talk to your kids

What's the story?

What's the story?

Is it any good?

Is it any good?

Movie themes & details

Movie Details

Watch our review

Review It

Review My Bloody Valentine 3-D

What parents & educators say

Most useful reviews by all members

only good seen in 3-D

3D FOR ADULTS!!!

ADULTS ONLY!

YUCK! CLOSE YOUR EYES! DON'T SEE THIS!

great for littel kids and 3 years old

Possibly ok for older teens

innapropriate not that scary suprisingly

Surprising Good

My Brutal Exerience

Watch it with friend

NOt that inappropriate!! Pretty good movie actually!

not for kids.

WHAT THE KRABBY PATTY IS WRONG WITH THIS MOVIE!

I was dodging and ducking.....3D was awesome!!!

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