What I Wish Adults Knew About How Teens Use AI

Dear adults,

I'm 16 and I want to set the record straight. I swear teenagers are not stupid. We're not even lazy (most of the time). Sure, we use AI, but it's more balanced than you think. We're not using AI because we don't value our own minds, our own relationships, our own humanity. For us, AI use is not the problem, it's a symptom of something bigger.

I know AI has you all worried about teenagers becoming stupid, socially inept or isolated, and dishonest cheaters. These are real fears that I also share, and I can guarantee you most teenagers aren't trying to be idiots who can't get jobs or girlfriends later on.

A variety of factors influence why and how we use AI. Often, AI use is just a byproduct of bigger problems facing teenagers, and should be examined in that context.

Let me try to explain what us teenagers are worried about. First, we feel immense pressure to be more, to achieve more, and to do it quickly. This pressure comes from social media, our parents, our peers. On social media it appears everyone is living their dream lives and getting there fast—we constantly feel like we're falling behind. This mentality leads to the prioritization of certain goals, and not the prioritization of our morals or mental growth. It's worth noting that teens' goals look a certain way: They're all about accomplishments on paper, on screen, that can be shown off. They're not about mental growth or internal development. This is due to social media.

A teenager might use AI to finish their routine math sheet and knock out seemingly meaningless tasks.Which is fine, because we genuinely do not have the capacity to care. It's a waste of time when we have so many other stressors and major things to worry about: college admissions, the SAT, our extracurriculars, our side hustles … you know, making it in life. Sure, some teens use AI to cheat on tests or write essays, but it's way harder than it seems (when you have observant teachers and phone bins, and everyone knows what AI writing sounds like). But, if given the option, we will take the route of the least friction and the most glory—don't pretend you adults don't do this too, it's just part of this world's cultural priorities.

We have been taught to deprioritize learning, critical thinking, overcoming struggle, and have been taught to prioritize our achievements, speed, and productivity. This general mentality pushes nervous teens to cheat and take shortcuts. Much like an arms race, whoever can get the furthest, fastest, all while doing the least work, wins. AI use is not causing this. It is a symptom of a problem caused by societal pressures, social media, and the adults in our lives. AI use is a way to alleviate pressure and gain precious time. There's never enough time, it seems. As Nuwanda says in Dead Poets' Society, "Gotta do more, gotta be more!" Teens feel this pressure, and AI can lift some of it off our shoulders.

Teens are also more lonely than previous generations, and it's not because of AI. In fact, COVID (which happened right before the crucial middle school years for most teens) severely stunted our socializing skills. When it comes to social knowledge learned through experience, like "how to get a date," we fail dismally. We might ask a chatbot or social media; we don't ask our parents because they're unc, and we don't ask our peers because they judge. The decline of real romantic relationships among teens and the increase of hookup culture can push us to find substitute relationships in a chatbot, but these cases are not the norm. In my experience, most teens stick to asking chatbots just for case-specific advice. (How can I resolve this dispute with a friend? Help me write a message to my coach. Any promposal ideas?) Even then, we rely more on social media (other people's experiences), because we trust humans more.

AI companionship is a solution used by a few to solve the drastic version of a problem faced by many: Teens who just need help with real relationships. A variety of factors are to blame for this loneliness (people love writing books and articles on it), but the bottom line is, we just want something real and don't know how to get it. Most of us would much rather date a human than a chatbot!

Another thing to consider is that the world is frankly absurd and sometimes we just want to laugh at it all, even at the cost of our mental capacity. If we weren't laughing, we'd be crying. We watch AI brainrot and generate idiotic content because we find it comforting, distracting. When everything is serious and scary, and the world outside seems even more absurd than brainrot, something artificial isn't so bad. Of course, the concept of AI itself is something we fear too; it's unpopular (as you may have seen in recent commencement speeches), taking our jobs, taking art and music, and taking our planet's resources, but AI slop feels benign. Honestly, what's wrong with rotting my brain if there are bigger threats waiting in the future outside? Also, why have a brain anyway if AI will just take my job anyway? I'd rather just laugh. Sometimes we feel this way.

I hope you haven't become depressed or worried about my generation. These types of problems have always existed. New technology amplifies and makes them visible, as AI serves as a visible medication for underlying and persistent issues. But yes, pressure, loneliness, and cynicism are not going away with AI, and using AI to medicate definitely makes the problems worse.

But the thing I want to show you is, it's not our fault. Yes, teens use AI, but a lot of us wish we didn't have to. I genuinely believe that it's possible to devalue AI use among teens, but that would require a massive culture shift away from prioritizing rapid fulfillment of lofty goals, false connections, and absurd pessimism. So please, adults, instead of blaming us, instead of criticizing us … help us?