When We Were Infinite
By Lucinda Dyer,
Common Sense Media Reviewer
Common Sense Media Reviewers
Powerful story of friendship, expectations, and healing.
A Lot or a Little?
What you will—and won't—find in this book.
Where to Read
Community Reviews
There aren't any parent reviews yet. Be the first to review this title.
What's the Story?
WHEN WE WERE INFINITE begins as Beth Claire (the book's narrator), Jason Tsou, Grace Nakamura, Brandon Lin, and Sunny Chen are in their senior year at a highly competitive and pressure-filled California high school. All five are accomplished musicians and play together in a local youth symphony. Sunny, Brandon, and Jason's families are from Taiwan, while Grace's has been in the United States for generations. Beth has a Chinese American mother and a White father and sometimes struggles with whether she's quite Asian enough. The child of divorced parents, Beth is continually at odds with her mother and estranged from her father, but she's found the family she craves in her group of friends. After Beth and Brandon witness Jason's father (who's angry his son isn't living up to his expectations) beating him, she's determined to find a way to keep the group together after graduation. But even as Beth puts together a plan that will see all the friends going to the same college, it begins to come apart.
Is It Any Good?
This is a complex and deeply moving story that tackles hard issues around parental expectations, abuse, and teen suicide with insight and sensitivity. While When We Were Infinte does recycle the cliche about Asian kids and academic pressure, almost any teen will easily identify with the personal and academic struggles of Beth and her friends.
Throughout it all, the friends stand by one another, offering love and support through tough and emotionally challenging times. Readers aren't left wondering what life after graduation was like for the five, as the story follows them through their first years of college.
Talk to Your Kids About ...
Families can talk about the expectations parents put on their kids in When We Were Infinite. How do you think families can find a good balance between a teen's dream for their future and a different dream their parents may have for them?
What qualities do you most admire in your friends? What qualities make you a good friend?
Have any of your friends or family members dealt with depression or panic attacks? How hard was it for them to share their struggles even with those closest to them?
Book Details
- Author: Kelly Loy Gilbert
- Genre: Coming of Age
- Topics: Friendship, Great Boy Role Models, Great Girl Role Models, High School
- Book type: Fiction
- Publisher: Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers
- Publication date: March 9, 2021
- Publisher's recommended age(s): 13 - 18
- Number of pages: 368
- Available on: Nook, Audiobook (unabridged), Hardback, iBooks, Kindle
- Last updated: August 4, 2022
Did we miss something on diversity?
Research shows a connection between kids' healthy self-esteem and positive portrayals in media. That's why we've added a new "Diverse Representations" section to our reviews that will be rolling out on an ongoing basis. You can help us help kids by suggesting a diversity update.
Suggest an Update
Where to Read
Our Editors Recommend
Common Sense Media's unbiased ratings are created by expert reviewers and aren't influenced by the product's creators or by any of our funders, affiliates, or partners.
See how we rate