Blue Valentine

Movie review by S. Jhoanna Robledo, Common Sense Media
Blue Valentine Poster Image

Common Sense says

age 18+

Agonizing but beautiful adult drama about love and marriage.

R 2010 120 minutes
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Parents say

age 17+

Based on 7 reviews

Kids say

age 13+

Based on 10 reviews

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A Lot or a Little?

The parents' guide to what's in this movie.

What Parents Need to Know

Parents need to know that this intense, moving drama about a young couple's rocky relationship is fraught with moments that are both tender and true, with the truest being the most anguished. The complex, heavy material -- which includes abortion and hints of alcoholism -- will likely overwhelm most kids, except perhaps for the oldest of teenagers. Expect some sexual scenes with partial nudity (including one that originally earned the film an NC-17 rating, which was reduced to an R on appeal), swearing (including "f--k" and more), and drinking, as well as a number of forceful arguments.

Community Reviews

Shane T.
Shane T. Adult
November 25, 2017
age 17+
16 or 17 minimum.
BestPicture1996
BestPicture1996 Adult
January 1, 2015
age 17+

Anguishing look at one rocky relationship

I've been in a really great relationship for the past nine months, and this movie has TERRIFIED me as if I wasn't already to break up. Ryan Gosling and Michelle Williams play emotionally hurt and complex characters...you're not sure WHO to root for! I suppose the point of the movie is there is no good and bad guy, there's just got to be compromise on both ends. Dean is flirtatious and wild when he meets Cindy...and then that turns into being the "fun" parent, where he dips into immature territory sometimes. That leads Cindy to be the killjoy, this woman who's led a pretty rough life with bad parent role models. Though it is hard to understand why she criticizes Dean in the present scenes for having a job he likes, you see in the movie his annoyances wear on her. It's like for every pro to their relationship there's 2 cons. Even if you don't like the characters all the time, you'll feel like you've gotten to know them very intimately. Yes the famous NC-17 sex scenes are in here, but it's nothing glamorous. The sex in here is gritty and pretty hard to watch. Still, this is an engrossing drama, a trainwreck I couldn't stop watching. As Dean sings, "you always hurt the ones you love."

This title has:

Too much sex
Too much swearing
Too much drinking/drugs/smoking
See all 7 parent reviews

What's the Story?

Falling in and out of love is a puzzle that few can resist. In BLUE VALENTINE, in scenes laid out in non-linear order, viewers watch as a young couple, Cindy (Michelle Williams) and Dean (Ryan Gosling), first set their sights on each other and decide to build a life together ... and, later, watch that same life dismantle. It's an age-old story: How do two people find each other in this wayward world, only to lose sight of each other even when they're under the same roof? As one of the characters says: How can you trust your feelings when they can disappear just like that?

Is It Any Good?

Blue Valentine has nearly everything a movie needs to be perfect. It's got great actors who live in their characters as if there's no other place to be, a transfixing storyline, and a director so committed to his vision that he asked his actors to live together as a family during part of the shoot. There's nary a false note in the film; euphoric scenes feel euphoric, and painful scenes radiate pain. Sometimes it feels as if we're in the same room as Cindy and Dean experience their most tender and terrible moments. One scene plucked from their first date is filled with so much of the giddy flush of falling in love that your heart can't help but ache at the anticipation of what lies ahead.

But if you believe that movies are expected to provide an escape, you're out of luck here. Blue Valentine may not be the film to see for married couples having troubles (or anyone close to such a couple) -- it's much too real to offer respite. Then again, this may be one of the best films about a relationship's trajectory, from infatuation to unraveling -- and what an experience it is to witness.

Talk to Your Kids About ...

  • Families can talk about the movie's messages about relationships. Does it seem realistic? Would you want a relationship like the one portrayed here? Parents, talk to your teens about your family's values concerning dating and relationships.

  • How does the relationship portrayed here compare to other movies about couples? Is it similar or different?

  • Why do you think the movie was originally rated NC-17? Why do you think it was changed to an R?

Movie Details

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