Dating & New York

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Dating & New York
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A Lot or a Little?
The parents' guide to what's in this movie.
What Parents Need to Know
Parents need to know that Dating & New York is a romcom about relationships in the digital age. It aims to show that the classic cinematic storybook romance can't exist in today's world of texting, dating apps, and social media. The primary plot device is a couple's sexual contract, instigated by the woman, in which the couple agree to have friendship-based sex regularly while still pursuing other romantic and sexual entanglements. While a lot of the dialogue is flirty, sexual banter -- and the film is essentially about casual sex -- no sexual activity takes place on-screen other than kissing. Stereotypical gender roles are flipped, with the main female character uninterested in a committed relationship, while the man pines away, hoping for a long-term relationship. A few scenes involve alcohol, including a drinking game, and a character holds a cigarette before stating that she doesn't smoke. Language is limited to a supporting character saying "s--t" a few times.
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What's the Story?
In DATING & NEW YORK, Milo (Jaboukie Young-White) and Wendy (Francesca Reale) meet-cute on a dating app, where they hit it off. After a temporary mutual ghosting, Wendy convinces Milo that they can have the perfect relationship if they sign a friends-with-benefits contract, committing in writing to never fall in love.
Is It Any Good?
Thoroughly entertaining but obnoxiously derivative, this fairy tale romance is more of a statement that modern dating looks nothing like the romcoms of the past. And it's not wrong: For many people, dating has changed quite a lot since the time of When Harry Met Sally. Fewer people expect women to wait for guys to make the first move -- or even to wait for a moment of Serendipity to meet. Jonah Feingold makes a strong writing and directing debut with snappy dialogue, a creative trajectory, and a fresh concept; he didn't really need to pull material from other films to make his point, and the fact that he does detracts from Dating & New York's success. It feels less like he's paying homage to Nora Ephron, Lady and the Tramp, and L.A. Story and more like he's ripping them off.
The movie is laugh-out-loud funny in spots, although it's so proud of its own cleverness that it's also smug, as if it's waiting, hands on hips, for viewers to appreciate its brilliance. Milo's doorman (Jerry Ferrara) is the narrator; he gives advice to Wendy and Milo, saying things like "trust me, I know," but then never showing us why he knows or why he's the one voicing Wendy and Milo's love story. While the film succeeds in overturning traditional gender roles, it doesn't give the characters anything to talk about outside of pursuing love and lust, and it's pretty disappointing to see these old-school limitations in play when so much effort has been put into making a production designed to show how times have changed.
Talk to Your Kids About ...
Families can talk about the idea of a "friends with benefits" relationship. What messages does that kind of arrangement convey about love and commitment? Parents, talk to your teens about your own values when it comes to dating and relationships.
What's the appeal of romantic comedies? How does Dating & New York aim to take on classic examples of the genre? Which romantic films did you notice it referencing?
Do you think this film glamorizes hookups and casual sex? Why, or why not?
Do you think Wendy and Milo communicate well? Why, or why not?
Movie Details
- In theaters: September 10, 2021
- On DVD or streaming: April 19, 2022
- Cast: Jaboukie Young-White, Francesca Reale, Jerry Ferrara
- Director: Jonah Feingold
- Studio: IFC Films
- Genre: Romance
- Topics: Friendship
- Run time: 91 minutes
- MPAA rating: PG-13
- MPAA explanation: sexual material and brief language
- Last updated: July 1, 2022
Our Editors Recommend
For kids who love romcoms
Themes & Topics
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