Parents' Guide to Mean Machine

Movie R 2002 99 minutes
Mean Machine movie poster: A stern-faced man in the foreground and a group of incarcerated men holding soccer balls against a red and gray background

Common Sense Media Review

Alistair Lawrence By Alistair Lawrence , based on child development research. How do we rate?

age 15+

Violence and language in British soccer comedy-drama.

Parents Need to Know

Why Age 15+?

Any Positive Content?

Parent and Kid Reviews

What's the Story?

MEAN MACHINE follows imprisoned former England soccer captain Danny Meehan (Vinnie Jones) as he rallies a team of fellow incarcerated men to play a match against the prison's guards.

Is It Any Good?

Our review:
Parents say : Not yet rated
Kids say : Not yet rated

This is an enthusiastic but uneven retelling of The Longest Yard, which was originally made in 1974 starring Burt Reynolds and later remade in 2005 starring Adam Sandler. Mean Machine pits Jones' wayward former soccer star Danny Meehan against a group of corrupt prison officials and violent incarcerated people. With most plot points and key decisions seemingly resolved by some good (and not-so-good) natured skirmishes, the movie attempts to tread the line between funny and serious as well as heroic and tragic. It makes for an odd mix and leads to a hurried ending, but by that point all eyes are on the spectacle of Danny's squad of incarcerated people taking on an opposing team of prison guards in a climactic soccer match. The finale is as rough and ready as what precedes it. Much of the sweary, throwaway humor is particularly dated now, too, but there are probably enough nods to the history of the beautiful game to keep soccer fans just on side.

Talk to Your Kids About ...

  • Families can talk about the violence in Mean Machine. Did the comedic elements make it less shocking? Why, or why not? Does exposure to violent media desensitize kids to violence?

  • Discuss the strong language used. What did it contribute to the movie? Is a certain kind of language expected in a movie like this?

  • The movie is a remake. Have you seen any other versions? If so, how did this one compare? Why do you think some movies are remade?

Movie Details

Did we miss something on diversity?

Research shows a connection between kids' healthy self-esteem and positive portrayals in media. That's why we've added a new "Diverse Representations" section to our reviews that will be rolling out on an ongoing basis. You can help us help kids by

Mean Machine movie poster: A stern-faced man in the foreground and a group of incarcerated men holding soccer balls against a red and gray background

What to Watch Next

Common Sense Media's unbiased ratings are created by expert reviewers and aren't influenced by the product's creators or by any of our funders, affiliates, or partners.

See how we rate