Parents' Guide to Road House (2024)

With its no-holds-barred choreographed fight scenes and the raw sex appeal of its lead, Patrick Swayze, the original 1989 film has become something of a cult classic, despite its shortcomings. 2024's Road House sees a buff Gyllenhaal take on the role of bouncer Dalton, who this time is an ex-UFC fighter with a friendly smile that hides some inner turmoil. It becomes clear Dalton has his demons as an early scene sees him park his rundown car in the middle of a railroad crossing, only to change his mind about ending his own life at the last second. It's a scene totally out of step with the rest of the film, which never takes itself too seriously. There's a man-eating crocodile, a baseball bat carrying teenage girl, and one scene where after beating up a gang of five, Dalton himself drives them all to the hospital. It makes for a fun first half of a movie with plenty of dustups for Gyllenhaal to show off his impressive physical attributes. But by the time real-life UFC fighter Conor McGregor turns up as hired muscle Knox, any resemblance of a plot has been thrown out the door. Furthermore, while McGregor's Knox is a worthy adversary -- a man equal in stature to Gyllenhaal's Dalton and with a brashness that has been McGregor's calling card in and out of the UFC octagon -- his delivery of such cheesy lines as "it's been a while since I've been clubbing," while swinging around a golf club, fail to land in a movie that relies on big hits.