A lot or a little?
The parents' guide to what's in this movie.
What parents need to know
Parents need to know that this Stardust is not the 2007 film based on the Neil Gaiman novel, but a low-budget 1998 film about an old vacuum cleaner that slowly comes to life after inadvertently vacuuming up a bio-chip invented by the scientist father of the house. This could have been an interesting premise, but instead, the film is duller than vacuuming a living room. There is occasional profanity ("ass," "dick"), and some moments of corporate espionage that feel more like home invasions. There's nowhere near the action a film like this should have, and the amateur hour feel of the production makes this one to avoid.
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What's the story?
Scientist Karol Wasacz (Olek Krupa) has invented a bio-chip -- a computer chip that can give life to inanimate objects and offer endless scientific potential for the benefit of all mankind. But when he overhears his boss talking with a defense contractor about how the bio-chip will be used for war, Wasacz absconds with the bio-chip, hides it in his house, and is then framed for arson by his evil boss and sent to prison. While using an ancient vacuum made by an old company called STARDUST, Karol's son Charlie vacuums the bio-chip, and slowly but surely, Stardust comes to life. Charlie needs to learn the secret of the bio-chip, and must find a way to free his father before the evil corporate scientists find the bio-chip in the old vacuum cleaner.
Is it any good?
Stardust could have gone the quirky route, or it could have gone the action-packed route, but instead, the movie plods along with all the slowness of an old vacuum cleaner. After all the action of the first 10 minutes, culminating with the father being sent to jail after being framed for arson, scenes drag out longer than necessary, to say nothing of the scenes that feel superfluous. The vacuum cleaner that is supposedly brought to life doesn't even develop much of a personality until the very end; before that, it spits gunk and eventually learns to repeat the word "peace" over and over again.
Perhaps the most interesting thing about Stardust is that it was filmed on-location in Hamtramck, Michigan. The acting is decent, and had this been in more capable hands, this movie could have been entertaining. Instead, the low budget and amateur-hour feel hinder any potential this movie had to be worthwhile viewing.
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