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Parents' Guide to

The Mask You Live In

By S. Jhoanna Robledo, Common Sense Media Reviewer

age 15+

Moving documentary examines what it means to be a man.

Movie NR 2015 97 minutes
The Mask You Live In Poster Image

A Lot or a Little?

What you will—and won't—find in this movie.

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age 14+

Based on 7 parent reviews

Mark F.
Mark F. Adult
June 19, 2023
age 15+

Excellent Film! Parents should watch PRIOR to showing their kids because there are a few sensitive topics (e.g., porn, mass shootings, rape)

As a male born and raised in America, I really appreciate this film and its message! It saddens me to read the negative reviews. So many people prefer to keep their "blinders" on and fail to appreciate scientific research. Some people are even labeling it as "anti-male" which is FAR from the TRUTH---this film promotes HEALTHY masculinity (beneficial to males)! For those of you stating that the film argues American masculinity is the "ROOT CAUSE" of most of modern society's problems, you are INCORRECT! Stop thinking so dichotomously! The film illustrates how it is a CONTRIBUTING FACTOR to the issues mentioned...NOT the sole reason. The film focuses on drawing the connection between the problems and masculinity because that is the FOCUS of the film. An entirely separate documentary could be made on each of the issues because they are complex! The negative reviews speak to how there is a profound lack of appreciation and utilization of science in America. Unfortunately, political hyperpolarization and the spread of misinformation are only making this problem worse. NOTE: Parents should watch PRIOR to showing their kids because there are a few sensitive topics (e.g., porn, mass shootings, rape).

This title has:

Educational value
Great messages
Great role models
techmomYo
techmomYo Adult
November 26, 2020
age 15+

Understand boys and men' emotions

Great documentary video shows how boys and teens deal with their emotions. What should be our social values? How teens see themselves? What can educators do? Good for teens to watch. The later part may be too deep for younger teens.
See all 7 parent reviews

What's the Story?

THE MASK YOU LIVE IN is a moving, often intense look at how boys grow up to be "men" -- and what it means to be masculine and manly in today's society. The film starts from the premise that the traditional image of strong, tough guys is the product of a culture that tells boys they can't cry, can't be "sissies," and must always show an impenetrable exterior to the outside world. And then it shows how that perspective has led to generations who aren't in touch with their feelings and have trouble connecting emotionally -- which in turn leads to everything from failed relationships and school trouble to abuse and self hatred. Through in-depth interviews with experts and dozens of discussions with boys and men of all ages, director Jennifer Siebel Newsom shows how hard it is for boys to navigate this challenging terrain. But she also offers plenty of reasons for hope as her subjects explain how they're trying to raise the next generation of men differently.

Is It Any Good?

Our review:
Parents say (7 ):
Kids say (2 ):

Newsom takes on a tough subject with confidence, which makes Mask incredibly effective and moving. It starts with young boys and how they're trained to hide their softer, more empathetic selves, then delves into the turbulent teen years and talks about the issues and experiences that complicate men's experience of being men -- including drugs, drinking, porn, feminism, fatherhood, and what's referred to as "rape culture." It's the same approach Newsom used so effectively in her earlier film, Miss Representation, which looked at the media's impact on girls and women.

What what makes The Mask You Live In so effective are the candid, heartfelt stories that the interviewed boys and men share about their lives, as well as the sheer number of them. The details change for each subject, but the overall message is the same, and it gets hammered home time after time, eventually taking on more and more meaning: We need to find a way to let boys maintain their sense of selves without having to hew to an outdated, irrelevant stereotype. Our future depends on it. Mask is at times difficult to watch, but it's a must if we're to raise a new generation of emotionally healthy young men.

Talk to Your Kids About ...

  • Families can talk about being a man. What does it mean to be "manly"? Did your opinion change after watching The Mask You Live In ? How are boys currently taught to be men? Can/should that change?

  • What is The Mask You Live In saying about traditional gender roles? How have these roles changed over the decades? How might they continue to change? What will impact that?

  • What makes a celebrity or character a positive role model for boys? Who are your role models, and why?

  • The Mask You Live In includes lots of footage of sexuality, violence, and drinking/drug use. Does it glamorize these topics in any way? What makes its treatment of these topics different than the movies/shows/life experiences they originated from? What are the consequences -- both stated and implied?

  • How does The Mask You Live In promote empathy and integrity? Why are these important character strengths?

Movie Details

Did we miss something on diversity?

Research shows a connection between kids' healthy self-esteem and positive portrayals in media. That's why we've added a new "Diverse Representations" section to our reviews that will be rolling out on an ongoing basis. You can help us help kids by suggesting a diversity update.

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