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Parents' Guide to

The Next Best Thing

By Barbara Shulgasser-Parker, Common Sense Media Reviewer

age 13+

Drama about untraditional parenting has sex, mature themes.

Movie PG-13 2000 108 minutes
The Next Best Thing Poster Image

A Lot or a Little?

What you will—and won't—find in this movie.

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age 13+

Based on 1 parent review

What's the Story?

THE NEXT BEST THING establishes the close friendship between straight Abby (Madonna) and gay Robert (Rupert Everett). They mourn a friend lost to AIDS together. They commiserate when she's dumped by a cad. In drunken grief, they have sex (not shown) for the first and only time. When a son is born, Robert moves in with Abby and commits to being a full-time father. Life is good until Abby falls in love with a guy who wants to marry her and move her and the 6-year-old child away from Robert. As Robert and Abby never married, Robert is left with few legal options when Abby sues for full custody and the right to take the child out of California.

Is It Any Good?

Our review:
Parents say (1 ):
Kids say (1 ):

This watchable, intelligently constructed film wrestles with modern issues. Those include tolerance, prejudice, feminism, nontraditional families, love, and the failure of the legal system to catch up with the conflicts these matter raise. The movie doesn't say so, but it should be noted that, under the movie's specific plot constraints, Robert would have been at a disadvantage legally even if the character had been straight. Everett's performance is absorbing and beautifully nuanced. The writing realistically reflects the pain of being a single woman of a certain age and of being gay in a largely intolerant culture. Their woes are not equivalent, but the movie makes the point that society, the legal system, and prevailing religions prefer their adults straight and coupled, making it tough for those who fall outside the norm. Although the movie may not interest many teens, those who do watch will find lots to analyze and discuss.

Talk to Your Kids About ...

  • Families can talk about how the movie pictures gay people. Do you think it's trying to portray them as very different from straight people, or does it seem to emphasize similarities between the gay and straight communities?

  • What questions does the movie pose about parental rights? Do you think the movie takes sides about the difference between caring for a child and being the child's biological parent?

  • What is the movie's position on prejudice? Is it a bad thing to judge people based on appearance or our preconceived notions about them?

  • What makes a family? What makes a good parent? What does this film contribute to that discussion?

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