Parents' Guide to The Ref

Movie R 1994 97 minutes
The Ref movie poster: Denis Leary stands with a gun and one leg up, foot bracing against a frame, while a man and woman are tied to chairs in distance

Common Sense Media Review

JK Sooja By JK Sooja , based on child development research. How do we rate?

age 15+

Sex, peril, language in '90s marital hostage tale.

Parents Need to Know

Why Age 15+?

Any Positive Content?

  • The Ref Trailer
  • The Ref movie: Judy Davis left, Kevin Spacey right, and Denis Leary center sit in a car at night
  • The Ref movie: In a bedroom, Denis Leary left points a gun at a man and woman tied up to a bed with a teenage boy sitting at the foot of the bed
  • The Ref movie: A White family of 8, each wearing a hat with lit candles in a circle sticking up, sit around a full dining table about to eat

Parent and Kid Reviews

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age 16+

Based on 1 parent review

 

 

See all 1 parent review
 

 

What's the Story?

In THE REF, jewel thief Gus (Denis Leary) almost gets caught on a job. On the run, he takes hostage Lloyd (Kevin Spacey) and Caroline (Judy Davis), a married couple on the brink of divorce, and they retreat to their home. But extended family are on their way for a Christmas Eve dinner. What will Gus do? Will he be able to deal with Lloyd and Caroline's marital bickering? Will Lloyd and Caroline find a way to reconcile?

Is It Any Good?

Our review:
Parents say ( 1 ):
Kids say : Not yet rated

More drama than comedy, the film gets ridiculous after the halfway mark. But the performances in The Ref are played sincerely, with Denis Leary and Judy Davis particular standouts. And there's a kind of play- or stage-like quality to the script that allows for the cast to shine, a tonal sincerity that is exemplary of the '90s, but it boasts a stronger takeoff than landing. Despite the absurdity, the earnest performances and tonal sincerity just about hold the film together.

For some, however, suspending disbelief will be more difficult, especially as the film devolves into a farcical Home Alone kind of thing once the extended family arrive. Rather than the brutal realism of another clear predecessor, Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf, The Ref is trying to say something about forgiveness and reconciliation. While not exactly funny funny, the script still tries to find humor in the "serious." This is watchable but not particularly memorable.

Talk to Your Kids About ...

  • Families can talk about violence in comedic dramas. What scenes of verbal violence in The Ref stood out to you?

  • Did you find the main characters likable? Why, or why not?

  • Are you satisfied with the ending? Were you expecting it, or did it surprise you?

Movie Details

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The Ref movie poster: Denis Leary stands with a gun and one leg up, foot bracing against a frame, while a man and woman are tied to chairs in distance

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