Witless Protection

 
Lowbrow comedy is crude -- and not very funny.
  • Review Date: June 9, 2008
  • Rated: PG-13
  • Genre: Comedy
  • Release Year: 2008
  • Running Time: 97 minutes

What parents need to know

Positive messages

For all of the movie's sexist humor -- some jokes verge on racist, too -- you get the sense that Larry's a good guy at heart. He's loyal to his girlfriend, only wants to do good, and, in the end, saves a woman from the bad guys.

Violence

Lots of fistfights and gunfights, some involving shotguns and handguns. People are shot at, and two characters have a major brawl in which they kick and hit each other. A man also slaps a woman around.

Sex

A man stands naked except for a baseball cap covering his nether regions. A woman is shown in a few positions that could be construed as sexual (even if the contexts aren't); lots of jokes about women (one is described as "big-t-ttied and quick witted," as if it were a compliment) and sex (Lary makes a comment about a farmer and his horse). A main character walks around in skimpy clothes. A porn magazine is displayed in a car.

Language

"T-ts," "ass," "bulls--t," and the like. No "f--k"s, but Larry does give a contraption the finger. Also lots of crude descriptions about body parts.

Consumerism

General Motors is mentioned, and signage for a farm is clearly displayed. Also, one character is clearly wearing a Burberry dress. Billy Ray Cyrus is name-checked.

Drinking, drugs, & smoking

Larry takes a swig from a bottle of what looks like whiskey; some social drinking; a character constantly smokes.

Parents Need to Know

Parents need to know that much of the humor in this lowbrow, mostly unfunny Larry the Cable Guy comedy is crude, sexual, sexist, and racist. Women wear skimpy clothes and are objectified, and there's tons of toilet/body part humor. Also expect some swearing (of the "ass" and "bulls--t" variety), violence (a polo match becomes particularly brawl-y), drinking, and smoking.

Parents say

Not yet rated
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What's the story?

Small-town deputy sheriff Larry Stalder (Larry the Cable Guy, doing his typical schtick) dreams of becoming an FBI agent (or at least approximating the cool of one). But as the movie's opening sequence -- in which the big-bellied comedian is in middle of a Navy Seals-type workout and can't keep up -- makes clear, he doesn't have the right stuff. So when he spies a group of men escorting a clearly resistant Madeline (Ivana Milisevic) through his diner hangout, he decides to rescue her. The problem? Her "guards" are from the bureau, and now Larry's on their bad side. Eager to make an FBI connection, Larry arranges a drop-off. But when the agents break the rulebook (which Larry has, apparently, memorized), he's convinced they're crooked. He decides to protect Madeleine -- who, it turns out, is a high-profile witness in a major federal case -- and deliver her to safety in Chicago.

Is it any good?

QUALITY
 

Anyone curious about what this movie is like need only read the title: WITLESS PROTECTION. It is, indeed, silly and pointless. The jokes, some of which are at the expense of women and many of which are dependent on tired bodily-function gags, falter on delivery. Though there are one or two funny moments -- an extended riff on airport security has promise -- the film is, for the most part, a disappointment

What saves it from being a complete dud -- or, rather, from a one-star review -- is Larry himself. He approaches the material with commitment, however misguided his efforts may be. He's funny (as is Jenny McCarthy, who plays his waitress girlfriend), and he has an ease about him that makes him perfect for physical comedy; watch him negotiate a homemade exercise contraption, and you'll be convinced. But he deserves much better material.

Families can talk about...

  • Families can talk about comedies that are intentionally crude/lowbrow. What makes them appealing? What's the draw of toilet humor and sexist jokes? Is there a specific line between humor and bad taste? If so, who determines where it falls, and how do you know when something has crossed it? Who do you think the target audience is for this movie? Why?

Movie details

Theatrical release date:February 22, 2008
DVD release date:June 9, 2008
Cast:Ivana Milicevic, Larry the Cable Guy, Yaphet Kotto
Director:Charles Robert Carner
Studio:Lionsgate
Genre:Comedy
Run time:97 minutes
MPAA rating:PG-13
MPAA explanation:crude and sex-related humor.

This review of Witless Protection was written by

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  • Not for Kids: Not age-appropriate for kids; not recommended for learning.

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What parents and kids say

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Kid, 10 years old December 11, 2009
age 9+
 

kids

it was good
What other families should know
Too much swearing
Adult Written bybporter28 April 9, 2008
age 0+
 

The WORST film of all time!!!

What an absolute disgrace to movies. Should be filed between The Hottie and the Nottie and Who's Your Caddy? Two stars from Common Sense....give me a break!! 1/2 star out of 5
Teen, 14 years old Written byILUVMEAT April 9, 2008
age 0+
 

Larry the cable guy fails to dissapoint agian

This is actually the first Larry the cable guy movie I have seen. It made me laugh the whole time. I have no problem with language. I didnt have a problem with sex (if there was any real bad stuff) I dont see how commercialism is a problem and Never have a problem with it. This is a great gut buster for 13+

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