A Grimm Warning: The Land of Stories, Book 3

I recently picked up this book thinking I would somewhat enjoy a silly kids story. Yet, to my surprise it was nothing of the sort and I think it’s the stupidest thing I have ever read, or will read. For starters the main character Conner makes a joke about their Mother’s uterus as if it was perfectly appropriate. Alright, now for someone older I could let that fly, maybe like a 15 or 17 year old, but not a 12 year old. Little boys and girls don’t need to be thinking about that sort of thing. When I thought things couldn’t get any worse Conner makes a reference to the, “Birds and Bees Talk.” This is a very delicate matter that no twelve year old should be hearing about, unless it’s from their parents. It’s a very sacred topic and shouldn’t be randomly thrown in a book as a gag for a few cheap laughs. I won’t go after the violence because unlike sex it can have just causes. It really depends on what you as a parent think your child can handle. Personally, I don’t think violence is a main concern as long as it’s not overly graphic. Violence is sometimes necessary in life to defeat an evil. To add to the cake of stupidity, Conner is not even remotely believable nor his sister Alex. They sound years ahead of themselves as if they were adults. Alex is the oh so responsible one, and super powerful fairy. While her brother Alex is the cool smart one with the cheap comebacks. I personally dislike this, I feel like they should act more their age. I understand that their experiences in the story have matured them, but let’s be honest no thirteen year old is thinking about a long time relationship or worrying if they will be worthy of some position. Heck, when I was thirteen I was thinking about how I was gonna have a good time with my friends, and getting food in my belly. Lastly before I leave off the Bree Campbell, Connor, Alex, and her crush thing is just the worst. It makes the story ten times more stupid, and lowers the rating seriously. I understand children at that age are maturing and developing certain emotions, but I think the Author could have stayed away from that. It’s not necessary to the plot, and isn’t introduced in such a way as to show how those things can be positive and beautiful when approached correctly. Rather it’s the classic throw it out there high school romance that furthers the silliness of girls, and gives boys wrong ideas on how to treat girls. I think it’s actually harmful to the young audience and for that reason it gets knocked down to two stars.

As a parent, a former educator, and therapist, I have real concerns about this series, and about this book in particular. I love Chris Colfer and was excited to share him with my daughter. She is in the 3rd grade, but reads at a 5th-grade level and some of her friends had read this series already. Just because a kid CAN read these books does not mean that they SHOULD. The implied sexual references and occasional swears do not bother me as much as scenes like this one from chapter 26: The General Marquis shoots two men in the foot with his pistol. As they moan and cry out in agony, the reader realizes that the General did this so they couldn't run away from the dragon, "the camp heard the colonel and captain scream as they were eaten alive." Beloved characters ARE killed off, know this. Some children have a hard time with these sorts of events. There is a lot of talk about various means of execution- being burned alive, beheaded, etc. A LOT of gunfire. At one point an entire herd of helpful unicorns are killed by the dragon. A lot of talk about bodies, corpses, death. So just know these things before allowing your child to read the books. The fairy tales are classic, and obviously had a lot of disturbing material in them as well. It's just never been presented with as much gore and brutality as is found in these books. I still love Chris Colfer, and I would give these books 5 stars if he removed these little snippets of darkness that permeate the plotlines. The stories would still be awesome without it!