Hatchet

Movie review by
Cynthia Fuchs, Common Sense Media
Hatchet Movie Poster Image
Gory monster/slasher spoof is drenched in blood.
  • R
  • 2007
  • 93 minutes

Parents say

age 16+
Based on 5 reviews

Kids say

age 16+
Based on 5 reviews

A lot or a little?

The parents' guide to what's in this movie.

Positive Messages

Victims are rude, selfish, careless, and self-pitying; locals are demented (one is said to "drink his own piss"). An Asian character is especially stereotypical, soliciting a snide comment about "Uncle Remus meets Bruce Lee," with both terms being meant disparagingly.

Violence

Lots of spurting blood and eww-inducing vomit/spit. Monster (hunchbacked, deformed, gooey, and nonverbal) attacks two men at the start, leaving exposed bloody body parts and pulling out entrails in close-up, with blood spatters. Description and flashback of father "whacking" Victor in the head with a hatchet (bloody). Alligator attacks boat party; Marybeth shoots it (more blood). Once Victor appears in the woods, the assault is nonstop, featuring jump edits, screaming, running, falling, bloody hacking, insides pulled out, heads cut off and bouncing, a chainsaw, and (of course) a hatchet. Bodies look as if Victor has eaten them. Weapons include a gun and sharp implements (chainsaw, hatchet), as well as gasoline and a lighter (monster set on fire).

Sex

Repeated "girls gone wild"-style breast barings (nipples visible), as well as a girl-on-girl kiss encouraged by a sleazy videomaker. A couple tongue-kisses. Much talk about sex and desire by young men, including slang ("skank," "boobs," "t--ties," "nipple," "cooch," "sweaty balls," "d--k," "bag of d--ks," "lick me"). Discussion of syphilis ("You can't hook up with itchy chicks"). Ben describes imagined scene of ex-girlfriend "bent over" a love seat during sex with another man. Mentions of Playboy and condoms. Derogatory slang ("queer") and repetitive Marilyn Manson song lyrics ("Sex sex sex").

Language

Plenty of strong language, including multiple uses of "f--k" and "s--t" (with more in the Marilyn Manson song "This Is the New S--t," which plays at the beginning and end of the movie), as well as "bitch" (again, with more in song lyrics), "damn," "hell," "a--hole," "bastard," and "c--ksucker." Frequent obnoxious exchanges are peppered with "shut up" and "you suck."

Consumerism

Mentions of Mini-Cooper, Emeril (Lagasse), Chris Tucker, Jackie Chan.

Drinking, Drugs & Smoking

Father smokes a pipe. Various background characters smoke cigarettes and drink beer in an early Mardi Gras scene. A boy wears a necklace shaped like marijuana leaves.

What parents need to know

Parents need to know that this gory, low-budget monster/slasher spoof is drenched in blood, including fake-looking but explicit dismemberments and beheadings. The first violent scene is typically sketchy (though it leaves bloody corpses), but later scenes are incessant, with blood spewing, lots of screaming, and limbs and heads flying. Weapons include a gun and sharp implements (chainsaw, hatchet), as well as gasoline and a lighter. There are frequent breast shots (part of a repeated joke about girls baring their chests for a "girls gone wild"-style video) and descriptions of adolescent male sex fantasies, with crude language. Swearing includes "s--t," "b--ch," and a select few "f--ks."

User Reviews

  • Parents say
  • Kids say
Adult Written bycallofduty5 December 28, 2010
This film was in my opinon very awesome a bit too gorey slasher spooffest Kinda funny at the times but really talk to your kids before you want to see this film... Continue reading
Adult Written byChuck Reid March 15, 2012

Spooky fun!

This movie was AWESOME! It is one of the best horror movies ever made!
Kid, 9 years old April 10, 2009

Do not watch!

Horrible slasher movie I saw when I was 8, but it was too stupid for anyone to watch. Not for kids 16 and under.
Teen, 17 years old Written bygorilla99swell August 24, 2015

NO KIDS

I bought this film on iTunes not knowing what I was gonna watch. Now I regret it, it is very disgusting wit major shots of boobs at the beginning, but then it j... Continue reading

What's the story?

In Adam Green's low-budget slasher spoof, buddies Ben (Joel David Moore) and Marcus (Deon Richmond) are visiting New Orleans for Mardi Gras. Because Ben is despondent over a recent breakup, good buddy Marcus accompanies him on a scary boat ride. They're quickly entranced by fellow boat riders Jenna (Joleigh Fioreavanti) and Misty (Mercedes McNab). The ride leads the foursome -- along with several other victims-to-be -- into the bayou, where they're soon beset by a deformed, unkillable monster. He turns out to be Victor Crowley (Kane Hodder, who's usually hidden under other makeup, such as in the sequels to Friday the 13th); tormented as a child, Victor now seeks vengeance on everyone who happens into his swamp. Ho hum. As Ben and Marcus do their best to keep each other alive through Victor's barrage of attacks, they're aided by Marybeth (Tamara Feldman), whose father and brother were offed at the beginning of the movie and who is now a walking repository of all monster lore.

Is it any good?

Over the top and awkwardly paced, Hatchet isn't very clever for a spoof; it explains or repeats too many plot points. Most of the jokes come in the casting (they're all good sports, these aging slasher-movie stars). But the slasher films were already spoofy, with Freddy Krueger's one-liners and Jason Voorhees' implacable plodding and chopping. And that makes this movie's comedy feel old.

Talk to your kids about ...

  • Families can talk about what draws people to this kind of movie. Why do people enjoy scary and/or gory movies? Does this fall into the "torture porn" subgenre? Why or why not? Does the quality of the production affect how scary (or not) a horror movie is? Families can also discuss whether this movie is innovative or conventional -- how is it similar to and different from other horror movies? Are you looking for creativity in a horror movie, or just blood and guts? Why or why not?

Movie details

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