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Remember Me

Movie review by
Sandie Angulo Chen, Common Sense Media
Remember Me Movie Poster Image
Dark, disturbing romance not for Twilight's preteen fans.
  • PG-13
  • 2010
  • 128 minutes

Parents say

age 14+
Based on 18 reviews

Kids say

age 13+
Based on 35 reviews

A lot or a little?

The parents' guide to what's in this movie.

Positive Messages

Although the overall message is about love and forgiveness, the majority of the movie is spent chronicling Tyler's self-destructive behavior and the emotionally distant or borderline abusive relationships between grieving fathers and children.

Positive Role Models & Representations

Tyler is a loving, selfless older brother, putting his little sister's needs above all else. He loves her so much, he's willing to defend her, to try and force their father to acknowledge and support her. However, he also starts off his relationship with Ally on false pretenses and doesn't tell her truth for a long time. Ally is forgiving, even when the men in her life hurt her deeply.


The movie starts off with a shocking murder -- a mother is shot by young muggers right in front of her 11-year-old daughter -- and violence continues throughout the movie. There are several fist fights that leave characters bloody -- in one instance a man nearly strangles another to death. A father strikes his daughter. A woman slaps a man across the face. A man pushes a schoolgirl's desk and throws a fire extinguisher through a school window, frightening all the students and the teacher in a class. A young man's suicide isn't shown, but it's frequently alluded to and explicity described. A young girl's hair is horrifyingly cut off by spiteful girls at a slumber party. An unforeseen and seriously traumatic event leaves all of the characters grieving and broken.


There are several love scenes that show the main couple kissing passionately, breathing heavily, moaning, and obviously making love. A couple of the scenes show a lot of skin (bare backs, legs, shoulder, and arms tangling in sheets) or Ally in a bra, but there's no actual nudity, and the emphasis is on the couple's faces. In addition to the sex scenes, Tyler's roommate discusses sex and relationships on a regular basis. He makes jokes about Tyler having a way with ladies and his own accomplishment of having "bagged" a girl from every continent. Ally's father accuses wealthy Tyler of slumming it with middle-class Ally ("having a little vacation in coach before heading back to first class").


For a PG-13 film, there is a surprising amount of strong language: more than one "f--k," plus frequent "asshole," "pr--k," "s--t," and "Goddamn," and the occasional "p--y," "jerk," "damn," "bastard," and "bitch."

Drinking, Drugs & Smoking

Tyler smokes cigarettes in nearly every scene, and it's an ongoing reference in the movie (everyone comments on it). College students drink at a bar, at parties, restaurants, and at home. One night Ally drinks so much she gets sick in front of Tyler and basically passes out on his bed. It's implied that Ally's father could be an alcoholic.

What parents need to know

Parents need to know that this coming-of-age drama starring Twilight heartthrob Robert Pattinson is not your typical teen romance. While it includes young love -- the two main characters are 21 -- the movie focuses much more on sensitive issues such as dealing with grief, coping with losing loved ones to violence and suicide, managing complicated parent-child issues, and, yes, falling hopelessly in love. Realistic violence (as opposed to the supernatural kind depicted in Twilight) is disturbingly persistent throughout the story, beginning with a cold-blooded robbery and murder and finishing with an act of violence that affects everyone in the movie. The language is stronger than usual for a PG-13 movie, with more than one "f--k," and many, many uses of "s--t" and "asshole," "bitch," "Goddamn," and the like. Pattinson and co-star Emilie de Ravin share several love scenes, but the camera focuses mostly on their faces and bare backs (no R-rated nudity). There's a lot of drinking and cigarette smoking. On a positive note, the movie explores the importance of repairing damaged relationships and allowing yourself to heal from loss.

User Reviews

  • Parents say
  • Kids say
Parent of a 3, 6, 8, and 12 year old Written byMidnightMom March 27, 2010

One of the best movies I have ever seen. HANDS DOWN!

I love this movie with all of my heart. For so many reasons, the message is wretchedly beautiful, it is acted to PERFECTION, seriously great acting by Pierce Br... Continue reading
Adult Written byFemiluv March 16, 2010
Some scenes with violence, sex scenes and some obscene language, but I loved it. Had a positive message to it. Superb acting from all of them. It was great to s... Continue reading
Kid, 11 years old July 25, 2010

I'm Surprised!

This movie was really good. It had a sad ending, though. The younger sister reminds me of myself (off topic!). I'm actually really suprised! -I thought... Continue reading
Teen, 16 years old Written byBryn Clare August 1, 2012

Remeber Me

I loved this story, but it is too intense for younger kids. There is a lot of PG-13 sex, and some swearing/smoking/drinking. Kids can identify with the main cha... Continue reading

What's the story?

Tyler (Robert Pattinson) is nearly 22, but he has no idea what he wants to do with his life. He audits classes at New York University, works part-time at a bookstore, regards his successful father (Pierce Brosnan) with contempt, and spends time nearly every day grieving his brother's suicide by writing letters to him in a leather-bound journal. After Tyler intercedes in a nasty street fight by pummeling the guys responsible, he ends up mouthing off to an NYPD detective (Chris Cooper), who roughs him up and arrests him. Tyler's superficial roommate Aidan (Tate Ellington) realizes the offending officer's daughter Ally (Emilie de Ravin) goes to NYU with them, and convinces him to attempt to seduce her as karmic payback for the beat-down. Instead, Tyler starts to fall for Ally, who like him, still grieves over the violent death of a loved one. As their romantic relationship deepens, both Tyler and Ally deal with their daddy issues and help Tyler's 11-year-old sister Caroline (Ruby Jerins) with her own insecurities. Just when Tyler begins to heal, Ally discovers the truth about his connection with her father, and violence continues to threaten their happily ever after.

Is it any good?

This is a confusing film; it's not difficult to understand, but it doesn't gel together as anything deeper than a shockingly gimmicky treatise on violence. It is not, despite what the trailers depict, just a romance, although there are romantic scenes thanks to the attractive leads. REMEMBER ME is more of a self-indulgent rumination on how various forms of violence and grief change people, from the intimate acts of suicide and a daughter's slap in the face to a cold-blooded murder and the collective horror of a terrorist attack. Unfortunately for viewers, director Allen Coulter and screenwriter Will Fetters don't have much of a vision other than building up to the shocking final 10 minutes, which, while gasp-inducing is a manipulative and unnecessary stunt.

Clearly Pattinson has practiced the brooding, downward gazing look of gorgeous young introverts. But as hard as Pattinson tries to sulk and simmer, cigarette in hand, he doesn't have the same edge as say Ryan Gosling or the late Heath Ledger or even his co-star de Ravin (for proof watch her fabulously creepy turn as Claire on Lost's final season). Pattinson isn't quite believable when he's punching a guy into a pulp or menacing a schoolgirl who made fun of his little sister. Of the two parent-child subplots, the de Ravin-Cooper relationship is so much better acted and developed. Brosnan, on the other hand, sports one of the worst Noo-Yawk accents ever captured on film, and as a result is hard to take seriously. The most entertaining supporting player is definitely Ellington as Pattinson's humorously verbose, jerk of a roommate. He is welcome, if at times annoying, comic relief.

Talk to your kids about ...

  • Families can talk about the theme of violence in the movie. How does violence affect each of the characters?

  • Is it difficult to see Pattinson as someone other than Edward? Who has been most successful in staying believable in roles outside the Twilight universe -- Pattinson, Kristen Stewart, or Tyler Lautner?

  • How did you feel about the twist ending? Was it shocking, or did you think it's still too soon to incorporate into a movie?

  • Both Tyler and Ally have problems with their fathers. Who has the stronger relationship? Is what he does forgivable? How do the two fathers react to grief differently?

Movie details

For kids who love romance

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