The Canyons

THE CANYONS achieved fame thanks to its behind-the-scenes stories and drama -- but its merits as a film are far less impressive. Pairing troubled starlet Lohan with well-known male porn actor Deen was guaranteed to draw attention, especially when paired with a script from Brett Easton Ellis, the successful writer who's made a career out of creating rich, jaded, amoral characters. Throw in director Paul Schrader (screenwriter of Taxi Driver, director of American Gigolo), and the film has all the ingredients needed to create plenty of heat.

But what we get is just a hot mess. Deen and Lohan are both compelling -- she's a pretty good actress, no matter what she does with her time off screen, and he's surprisingly charismatic. The main knock on Deen's Christian is that he's a one-note character who's all brooding menace -- though it's not clear whether that's because of the script, the direction, or just that it's Deen's only strength. No matter. Christian and Tara are just going through the motions of being a couple anyway; it's hard to see why they're together and why either should care if the other is unfaithful. And the audience has little interest in them. We don't much care whether they stay together or break up; either way, they're people we don't want to spend any more time with.